Standing at the Sink, Her Hands Coverd in Suds~ The Homemaker

    When we hear the term homemaker or stay at home mother, do we know what this entails? Is it the busy wife and mother, that lives for her family? The one taking on task of the household, her husband and their children?

If so, what does this say?
 Is she the woman filled with un-success?  Did she lose herself in the shuffle? What about her own wants that have nothing to do with her family?
 Doesn't she have interest and dreams of her own?

   

She is the wife and mother that lives for her family. As she is also the one taking care of them all. Does she have dreams and interest of her own? Of course, she holds them in her heart. As they are sewn in the upbringing of her family. Does she know how to be more than a wife and mother? Of course she does, as she also knows this is the calling of her chapter in life. The humble wife and mother- She is strong, she is smart and she glows with the beauty of the Lord.

 Where did I come to this understanding?  As a young wife and mother I was given advice. My advice was to strive to be more than just barefoot and pregnant. Find more than endless days with demands of your family. For you are a person too. The comment of barefoot and pregnant, I had to roll my eyes, but to the other part of standing loud and tall, I believed it whole hearted. Practicing this belief, my years were pridefully unsettling.
Oh how I needed to humbly grow.

One day while dry and thirsting, I read Proverbs 14:1.

At first it had a sting...

~The wisest of women builds her house, but folly with her own hands tears it down.

What is He saying?

Searching for understanding, I began highlighting scriptures of the woman, the wife and the mother. What once was just a sting, was now burning a hole through my myth of feminist belief.

~Titus 2:5  To be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands.

~Titus 2:4 And so train the young women to love their husbands and children.

~Ephesians 5:22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.

~Proverbs 21:19 It is better to live in a desert land than with a quarrelsome and fretful woman.

~Proverbs 12:4 An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who brings shame is like rottenness in his bones.

   

    This was very hard to swallow. Gritting my teeth, I knew my heart needed the virtue of humility.  Questioning the importance of the woman to our Lord, I continued to open my eyes to his word. Later understanding the roles of the family, I felt his love for me as a woman. Even more now than before. I could see his love for my marriage and for our family as a whole. Not only did I understand, I also knew we must walk this path. This path was the only answer.

  

   As a woman, yes I am to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to my husband. I can do this fully with the respect and love for myself. I can do this while also making time to reflect on my own. Even Jesus walked away on his own to pray. There is a balance we must maintain.

    As my husband is to love me as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. He is to love me as he loves himself. To live with me in an understanding way.

~1 Peter 3:7  Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.
~Proverbs 31:10-12 An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels. The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain. She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life

~Ephesians 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.

~Genesis 2:24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

~Ephesians 5:33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

      The laws of the Lord were created with love. A man should be the head, but he is to love his wife enough to place her feelings into his decisions.

I once was given wonderful advice of the crosses we carry.  Men tend to carry the cross of naturally turning away form decisions and women carry the cross of wanting to control their family.

Does this say we as women are not to make decisions, of course not. We are the heart of our family. Our millions of tiny decisions are made throughout each day. The key here is to make those decisions with the respect of my husband in mind and leaving the final decisions to him with the trust and the comfort that he takes in my feelings as his own.

 Our Role as Parents

~Psalm 127:3 Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward.

~Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.

~Isaiah 54:13 All your children shall be taught by the Lord, and great shall be the peace of your children.

    

With this my days are full, but prayerfully balanced.  Do I drift, do I fall? Absolutely! Do I have it all together? Not at all!  Do I strive for this as my core? Yes, very much so.
When I fall and life feels dry, I dust off and prayerfully walk back to my core. The duties of Allen's wife and our children's mother are the calling in this chapter we are living within. Each chapter of my life is valid and not one will be more important than the next.

I know the chapter with broken sleep, sticky faces, dinner on the table, bedtime stories, homeschooling, changing diapers, nose-nuzzles, a little one sleeping between momma and daddy, sorting laundry and washing dishes will be the most treasured chapter of all.
I am blessed to be here experiencing every moment.

Thanking the Lord for the knowledge of my role and the peace it sets in my heart.  

{To my friends that do not only work at home, but also manage a job outside of your family, this in no way is a negative to you. This is about my path in the Lords calling for our marriage and our family. To the many reasons one may need to work outside the home or only in the home is a call for each individual family. As mothers we are to cheer one another on. Offering a hand and inspiring our sisters in Christ}